Questions and Answers

Questions--

vital
unsettling
probing
clarifying
validating
curious
contemplative
desiring
perplexing

heaven-bound.

Answers--

consoling
uplifting
edifying
unifying
calming
testifying
foundational
truthful
confirming

heaven-sent.

9-17-17

(Pondering on how important it is to ask questions in our quest for spiritual growth and what those answers mean.)

He Finds Me

Lost little lamb that I am
          --He finds me.

In rocky crag
or storm-tossed sea
In mourning
or in pain
In solace
or lonely in a crowd
In unknown paths
or well-worn ways
In fearful anxiety
or pensive calm.

No matter where
                 or how
                     or why...

When I call...
                 or humbly ask...
                     or earnestly seek...

He finds me and carries me home.

9-17-17

(Sunday afternoon waiting for the general session of stake conference to begin.  Remembering Bishop Waddel's remarks [from the presiding bishopric] on Christ's ministry to each and every one of us from the Saturday night session.)

Real Strength

Power lifting?
     No, humble kneeling
     Gives me the strength to go on.

Gym time on machines?
     No, scripture time
     with spiritual "dews" descending.

The world craves a chiseled body with a showy physique.

My spirit craves Heavenly help with power endowed from on high.

                                                         --Real Strength!

(I have been struggling physically and it makes it difficult to manage each day.  I find my greatest strength is found in my relationship with Heavenly Father and in the scriptures.  Somehow, it helps me manage the physical demands of each day.)

9-18-17

View from My Window

Majestic
Sun-lit
Towering
Protective

Glorious
Reaching
Harbinger
Powerful

Picturesque
Storied
Legendary
Uplifting

Changing
Inspiring
Surprising
Constant

I love the view from my window!

(Written as I was sitting at my desk in my new classroom and enjoying the view of Mount Timpanogos.)

Down in the Mouth

Numbing
     Swelling

Whirring
     Smelling

Slurping
     Tasting

Poking
     Waiting

Stretching
     Swallowing

Filling
     Polishing

Testing
     Resting

----Fixing those cavities!

8-7-17  (I wrote this poem and a start to a picture book while watching Jen get her cavities filled--8 in one day.  They were the aftermath of her braces.)

Dad's 80th Birthday--An Alphabetic Adventure

Dad
80 years!

80 years that include:

A--Ability to turn almost anything into a hat or headpiece
B--Body surfing and even breaking a rib in the process
C--Catching a jellyfish with his bare hands
D--Dancing to Herb Albert and the Tijuana Brass with pretend maracas
E--Eating sweets when he really should behave with his diabetes
F--Fijian missionary and humanitarian provider--being loved by so many in the islands
G--Gardening in an old straw hat and sharing freshly picked kohlrabi in the process
H--Hiking with the kids on numerous excursions--even to the ranger station at Devil's Head
I--Isle de Pasqua--walking across volcanoes, climbing on statues and baptizing someone in the ocean
J--Jumping off a woodpile with a dishtowel cape trying out your superpowers
K--Keeping in touch using Ham Radio Operators to make regular Sunday calls from Easter Island
L--Leadership in a humble way--elevating others and empowering them
M--Marrying the most amazing companion for you--Mom
N--Never giving up on your family even when they have not always made great choices
O--Obediently living the gospel of Jesus Christ
P--Pizza making as a family tradition "Shakey's Pizza Parlour" style
Q--Quorum of the Seventy member (before it was changed to what it is today)
R--Revelation--worthily sharing priesthood blessings and changing lives
S--Switching the sun on and off for your kids while traveling in the car
T--Twinkling, mischievous eyes when playing the latest trick on someone
U--Understanding when your daughter hit two cars in one night
V--Valiant in his testimony and defender of truth and righteousness
W--Working amazingly hard to provide for a wife and 10 children
X--"x-tremely" talented conversing and sharing with others--making them feel loved and respected
Y--Young at heart--even at 80!
Z--Zoning in his recliner chair or enjoying a good football game there too

80 years of being loved and cherished!

8-7-17  Written in celebration of my wonderful Dad.

Parenthood

I've reached the heights of joy
     and yet, sometimes I feel despair.
This journey with my children
     shows no matter what--I care.

I live each moment in my heart
     with swells of gratitude.
The joys of seeing them succeed
     enhances every mood.

Then without warning I am dashed
     to pieces with their trials.
I yearn to find the happier time
     when life was just all smiles.

And yet as I reflect a bit
     on struggles we endure
I find my bond of love has grown
     of this I am so sure.

For in the struggles and the strife
     our love is strengthened best
The ties that truly bind us
    are the ones that stand the test.

8-7-17  (This poem percolated a bit before publishing.  I just was finding a place for my thoughts.  I love being a mom.  It is my greatest joy.  As I reflected I realized that the depth of my feelings comes from all the experiences we have had together--the good and the difficult).  Dedicated to my wonderful kids!

Forgive

How does He see me?
How does He see them?

It doesn't matter the condition of
their heart right now--only mine.

Bind my wounded heart and soul
Help me Savior true
Guide me to cleanse my inner vessel
And draw nearer unto You!

Humbly help me release--not blame
To transfer burdens giv'n.
Seek divine help from fountains pure
As I look up to heav'n.

7-27-17
(Attending a class on forgiveness and pondering what I need to do.)

One for the Team

It wasn't what I wanted
     --selfishness made its case
With love, I made a sacrifice
     and accessed Heaven's grace.

In lifting--I am lifted too
     and both of us feel higher.
I'm so grateful I could give a bit
     to be better--I'll aspire.

I took one for the team!

7-27-17
(On the occasion of being asked by Nathan to go to Education Week in Rexburg, Idaho.  I was not feeling well and was struggling to find the motivation to go on a trip.)

Hope

Develop patience
Feast on the word
Embrace affliction
Receive comfort
Seek peace
Endure well
Wait on the Lord
Exercise faith
Invite Spirit
Acquire meekness
Be true to your mission
Repent sincerely
Pray without ceasing
Access grace
Accept the Savior

7-27-17

Sacrament

Broken bread
          Willing heart
Broken promises
          --a new start.

Healing water
          Cleansing fire
Healing spirit
          --filled with desire.

Binding us to God.
My covenant sign.
I'll partake.

4-9-17  (Pondering during the sacrament--changed 7-25-17)

I Am a Writer

Imagining new worlds
Perceiving life differently
Capturing moments with word pictures
Creating experiences for someone else.

Struggling to find a voice
Persisting through creative lapses
Adjusting constantly to improve
Organizing jumbled thoughts.

Being vulnerable
Illuminating heartfelt feelings
Exposing ideas and thinking
Leaving a recorded legacy.

Waiting for validation and acceptance
Hoping efforts are fruitful
Anticipating a positive reception
Experiencing the joy of connecting.

Wishing to contribute
Reaching for a higher purpose
Feeling satisfied and fulfilled
Realizing potential.

5-30-17 (revised 7-10-17)

I Am Poems

I am a tear
Trickling slowly down a frightened child's cheek
Coursing rivulets from a devastated friend
Pooling threateningly in a proud mom's eyes
Letting the heart breathe.

I am a song
Blaring from a stereo
Bugging parents from another generation
Waltzing in a mind not clear anymore
Bringing everyone together in worship.

I am a smile
Shyly appearing under blushed cheeks
Replying to a friendly face
Reflecting a joyful heart
Making the world a brighter place.

2-21-17 (This was an exercise for a class. I finished the smile verse 7-10-17)

I Am From

I am from
     a desire fulfilled--
     a dream, a wish, a want.

I am from
     skinned knees and
     allergies and outside
     play til dusk.

I am from
     songs round the piano,
     guitar and cello too--
     each melodic strain building
     a symphony in my heart.

I am from
     a punny place
     a battle of wits to share
     the laughter rending a talkative bunch.
     There is appreciation there.

I am from
     a regency romance
     with gallant men and women of the past--
     a guilty escape I truly love.

I am from
     a tender heart
     that feels another's pain or joy--
     my tears flow easily and I love deeply.

I am from
     a simple place
     no fancy stuff for me
     I rarely shop--I am content
     more--I do not need.

I am from
     a teacher's nest
     my fledgling students many.
     They are all children--they've
     my heart and most of my time.

I am from
     a crazy family
     easily entertained
     marshmallow roasts over emergency candles
     or silly inane games.

I am from
     macaroni and cheese from a box
     whenever I cooked as a child.
     roller skating with old metal skates
     you put on your shoes--tightening with a key.

I am from
     a quiet place
     very deep inside of me,
     but a very opinionated place.

I am from
     a mother's heart
     pressed by worry and care.

I am from
     a father's love
     all my burdens to bear.

I am from
     love.

Perfect Square?

Thinking "outside the box"
Held by rigid boundaries--
stereotypes of what I should be.

What next?
Can I let go enough?
Allow myself to be redesigned, retooled--
even crumpled.
Can I be happy in a safe square?

Fear is the formula that keeps one square.
Messy outcomes
Unpopular choices
Clashing colors.

Faith is the key to freedom.
No bad outcomes
Self acceptance
Moving forward.

LET GO!

Candy

Candy

A sweet indulgence soothes my tired, achy day
It wakens me and lifts me up
and energizes I'd say--

But sadly, quickly fleeing--
it's flavor's soon forgot
And I am left just craving more--
a habit relieved a lot.

O Candy, are you the bane of my existence?
No--even short, sweet moments
in my memory have persistence.

I'll savor and I'll treasure each
sweet interlude--
Unless the pounds pack on too much
--I'll quite a while--so rude.

But, I'll be back--you see I'm hooked
I understand my fate.
You will always win--I sadly learned--
when I thought sweets so great.

[January 3, 2017]
This was done as an answer to the writing prompt--candy.